bloated.

Tue, 03 Feb 2009 03:44:30 GMT

ok just by the title you can picture something horrible, and it is...
today i went to my bf's house and ate crackers and cheese.
at first i couldn't resist and i tried just one, but then... i started to like it (im sorry). i felt so guilty and panic i just missed eating crakers so much...
my brightest idea after that (i dunno what happened to me) was to ate even more so i jumped into the kitchen and had 2 pieces of chocolate cake and some green olives. when i was done i went in the bathroom to puke but my bf came just seconds before and asked if i was ok. i had to go out imediately of course (he knows im propense to vomit after eating so much, sothat's why he checked on my damn it!).
so 5 hours afterwards im here in my house feeling bloated (stil!!) and im a cow now.
it's ughhhh so frustrating and horrible
i wish i hadn't eaten so fucking much.
its just DISGUSTING.

im fasting for as long as i can now...

xxx angustia.

finding strenght

Fri, 30 Jan 2009 17:21:52 GMT

this is the first time i do this "blog" thing.
i know what im doing this.
i need to stay strong, i need ana inside me, i can't let her go away.

ana is my godess, she is my guide, she is my life.
thinspo is not good enough anymore,
everyday my body gets weaker and the hunger grows.
everyday i feel more vulnerable to eat and i dont want to.

i need to write how i feel, i need to know other girls like me out there.
real girls who can understand me, who can guide me and know what im going through.

i hope this works.
i hope i can stay strong.
ana dont leave me, stay by my side forever.

xxx

EATING AWAY THE PAIN

bloated.

finding strenght